In grief, certain dates can hit hard... like birthdays. Birthdays are typically focused on celebrating life, growth, and future dreams—until that person dies. Then what? Our founder, Ashley, struggled deeply on her daughter's birthday and longed for a way to honor that day that felt right. Years after Skylar's death, she made a discovery that changed everything! Here are her words to tell the story:
On November 19th—what would have been my daughter Skylar's birthday—I longed to talk about her and keep her memory close. Even as a grief specialist, I struggled with how to naturally bring her into conversation. My daughter exists in this peculiar space: invisible to the world around me, yet vibrantly alive in my heart at any given moment.
It's rare that we're invited into conversation about people who have died. Those who are no longer alive become unmentionable, as if speaking their names might somehow disrupt the comfortable flow of everyday life. But at Momento Foundation, we believe in leaning into that discomfort—embracing the present with courage, even when it contains pain. Because we've discovered something profound waits on the other side of that vulnerability.
On my daughter's birthday, I asked a few close friends to join me for a walk to test a concept that would become the Remember Walk. November 19th fell on a weekday that year, so we agreed to meet in the evening. But in the winter, it's dark by 5pm! I was prepared with glow sticks and light-up accessories for safety and to add a little fun to the evening, and I asked each friend to bring a memento representing someone they loved who had died. We began walking and I shared my vision of a walk where we can share our mementos, telling stories, laughing, crying, and feeling the presence of our loved ones who have died while sharing them with others.
As the walk continued, we naturally paired off into smaller groups as we started walking. One friend pulled out a sun-faded photograph of her father from the 1970s—sporting short silky shorts, high white socks, and that classic mustache we all recognize. As she shared stories, I learned things about her dad—and about her—that might have remained forever undiscovered without this intentional space for remembering. While we were telling stories, something magical happened; layers peeled away, laughter mixed with tears, and we unlocked pieces of each other that felt sacred.
A Sacred Moment of Remembrance
What began as an experiment in grief became an experience of deep connection. When we finally hugged goodbye that day, we unanimously agreed: this needed to be an event that all were invited to. We held our first official Remembrance Walk in 2020 and invited 'quaranteams' to walk together. It was a huge success!
The Momento Walk provides safe spaces for friends, family, neighbors, coworkers, and new connections to celebrate and remember the people and pets who have impacted our lives. Year over year, we witness the magic of a single conversation and hope you can experience it with us in the future. Everyone deserves a space where their loved ones can be made visible again—if only for the length of a story shared on a walk. We are excited to create more healing connections and meaningful support in communities around the world.
